1st Samuel 16:7

update on our Honduran Angel

2011-08-19T11:56:00.001-05:00

This is the updated email I received from Josefina. Please continue to pray for Angel and the many other people in Honduras who need our help and prayers, not just for 1 week a year but year round. Also, in this post is the picture that Dr. Greg took, before he knew who Angel was. God was talking to him even then.

This email was sent Tuesday 8/16/11. sorry for the delay I will get better about updating sooner.

Dear Randall,

I hope this finds you well in health and spirits!

I am sending this message to share the blessing of seeing Angelica. I met her and her father, Alexander, for the first time last Friday.

We went together to the clinic where she used to be cared for. I looked for the Social Worker and found out who was the person that should help me with guidance on her case. I saw the doctor Angelica was supposed to be seen by, about 3 years ago, and she told me that according to the files, the treatment was abandoned. Then she sent me again to the social worked and she took me to the director of Social Services. When she looked at the papers we had, she said that in that clinic Angelica was not going to be able to find the support she needed because they provided other types of physical therapies but what she needed.

I told her that we wanted to find where the best place we could purchase the hearing aids for her...she said that those that we thought cost about Lps. 8,000 (rh note: = about $430 US each ear) were not of good quality...that those would last only about one year. Although, she said that she was going to have a brigade from the US that would bring donations for hearing aids (PRAISE THE LORD!!!!) and those were of a much better quality that would last up to 5 years.

She sent me to another clinic because in order to get the appropriate size for Angelica, she needed her ears cleaned from wax so that the molds were accurate. I went to that clinic that Friday, but they gave me an appointment for Monday (today).

Today, we meet early in the morning to go to the clinic. The doctor, an Othorryno (rh note: ENT) specialist, saw her and even tried to find out if she could hear at least a bit...he put her earphones that they had and Angelica did not respond...sadly he said that he was not confident that Angelica would be helped only by the hearing aids...he said that if it was, she would also need a speech therapist so that she could identify the noises and learn how to use them and also learn sign language to communicate...and said that this was expensive, but it was needed.

He prescribed a special test to compare to the one we had...we have an appointment for August 25th at noon...after this, we will see how it is to plan a follow up.

We returned to the first clinic by noon, and the molds were made. The Social Worker will call us to let us know the dates the brigade will be down here in Tegucigalpa for the hearing aids. She says that normally is about the end of September or October.

We are so blessed that the Lord provided this help for Angelica!...if we get the hearing aids for free, then the money could be good for the speech therapy!

I have used some money already for expenses such as transportation and food...this is a little bit, but it counts because I do not have a budget of my own to do this, only a great love and commitment to serving God in the needy. I will have a report on the expenses after the hearing aids are given.

Fr. Dagoberto sent me this afternoon a phone number for Karen Blanco, in Yuscaran. I have tried to reach her but she doesn't respond. I will continue to call tomorrow. I will wait for news about the other person when he comes back from San Pedro Sula, perhaps next week.

Let us keep praying for Angelica...for the Holy Spirit to lead us to do our best for her with His help.

Thank you for all you do to serve Him!

Stay in touch!

Your sister Josefina.

Picture taken by Dr. Greg

Please keep Angel, Josephina, and the many other people who are doing God's work in your prayers. Especially the one's we don't know.

as I get more information I will post it here.

Randall

Honduran Angel

2011-08-03T17:17:00.001-05:00

I recently returned from my 3 mission trip to Honduras in 4 years. We skipped a year due to political unrest a couple of years ago. This journey, all the 2 previous was filled with joy, spirit, suffering, pain, happiness and was both draining and refilling of mind, body and spirit.

Each year there are many stories and events that stick in my mind, but there is always one which stands out the most, the first year was bringing the bible back to a village, the next year was being an "official" police transport for 3 Honduran prisoners and their captors.

This year was no different. It was the 3 day of the medial clinics and we were set up in a village called Rancho de Obispo I have been to Rancho at least one other time before this.

There was something in the air, I could not put my finger on it but I knew God would be using our team in this village that day. It is not unusual to feel that way, but on this day it was particularly strong.

Early in the day, before our treatment nurse was completely set up, one of the providers, Dr. Greg, was performing 2 "minor" surgeries, which I found out about because someone came running into the pharmacy area and in a non-calm way announced "We need gauze, there is blood everywhere!" it wasn't bad, but there was a lot of blood from the cancerous growth being removed from an older gentleman's nose.

I thought maybe this was what we were here, for but the feeling didn't pass. As the day went on it was relatively calm and going along smoothly, we only say about 50 patients before lunch (a light load), it seemed that it might be an early day. Boy was I wrong... by the end of the day we had seen over 170 patients, a very long afternoon/evening.

In the middle of the afternoon, Dr. Greg sent someone to find me, I was performing the role of Administrator of the Day, a.k.a. the guy walking around with the cup of coffee :-) He needed me to talk with a family and the local church to see what, if anything we could do. This is when I met the Honduran Angel, literally her name was Angelica, Angel for short, she was 5 years old, and had the most beautiful smile. It hit me almost immediately I had noticed her playing earlier, which is not odd I have a tendency to remember many of the face of people i meet but in this moment it was almost as if I knew her. I think looking back i was not seeing Angel the little girl, rather I was seeing God in her eyes.

Dr. Greg went on to explain that Angel was almost completely deaf, they are not sure if she was born that way or if it has slowly deteriorated and they want to know if there is anything we can do to help. My first thought was not much except pray for a miracle. I then proceed to talk through two different interpreters to Angel's family as well as the local guardian, who would know about their financial needs and ability. I am not sure why I used 2 interpreters to talk to the family, maybe availability, but more likely I was making sure I was monitoring myself and asking all the right questions etc.

What I learned was Angel and her family had been to 3 doctors, one or two of which were hearing specialist, which had confirmed it was not external blockage or non-addressable internal issue. She was about 90% deaf in both ears. Her family had been working with her to include her in society as much as possible, they had their own version of sign language and could community on a rudimentary level. Toward the end i found myself signing as I talked to her, granted my signing is about as good as my picito Spanish but it was enough.

Toward the end of the conversation I took Angel's picture and showed her the camera. Most of the time, when you take a picture and show it to a Honduran they will point to the picture and look at it and may identify themselves or others in the picture. Angel however GRABBED the camera from me and studied it, then after a few seconds, she pointed to the picture of herself and said, what I guessed to be her version of the word "that" in Angel it is "dddddddddddt" then she pointed to herself. Next she said "that" again, pointed to her grandmother in the picture and to her grandmother sitting next to her, and a third time for her younger sibling sleeping in grandma's arms. She was SCREAMING in her soft voice, "I want to communicate!" "I want to learn!" I then helped her take a picture of Dr. Greg, and she repeated the "that" process and then indicated she wanted to she the picture of herself again.

Angel, Her Grandmother and baby sibling

So here we have an intelligent 5 year old little girl with a family that loves her and wants to help her be a productive member of society. I later found out in talking with the team at Rancho others had noticed her, as soon as I started to describe her, people responded with "the girl in the blue dress?" or "the little girl with the big smile" this to me was confirmation that i was not the only person God was talking to about Angel. Additionally, our pied piper (person who plays with the kids while parents wait/visit with the doctor) told me that the other kids had told her, the piper, that she couldn't talk, but had you not been told, you would have never know, she was right in the middle of the other kids, running, playing and laughing, even playing "duck, duck, goose" or as we call it in Honduras "gato, gato, raton" for 2 hours.

So what could be done, how could we help her, simple the specialist had already diagnosed her, she was a candidate for hearing aids but her family could not afford them, and they did not ask us to pay for them, they simply asked, if there was anything we could do to help them take the next step of the journey. How much are the hearing aides I asked... " 8,000 limpera each" with the current exchange rate that would be about $860 US for both ears. Not a small amount of money but to a Honduran a HUGE amount.

In my heart I had already decided I would find a way for Angel to hear her mother's voice, and I would be back to Rancho next year to hear directly from her what it was like. i also knew at that moment this is where God needs me for years to come and I would get the privilege of watching from a distance to see what God was going to do with Angel, it was clear to me he had a plan.

However, i could not tell the family this, all i could say was, we would pray about it and see where God leads us, and IF it was possible we would work with the local church to help in whatever way we could. We wrote down the Angel's name, her mother's name and an "address" and cell number where they should be able to be reached.

Later in the week I talked with our local person who helps with situations like this about what our options might be etc. i also talked with the leadership of Honduras Good Works to see what our financial options might be. On the financial side, HGW was able to "loan": the money with the intention of fund raising to back fill the coffers. on the medical side, Josephina was confident we would be able to mind a good doctor and the needed hearing aids and be able to get everything scheduled. Josephina would start working on it this week.

Tuesday night comes around and I got a message on facebook from Josephina, they had found and were working with a couple of other small cases we had identified and it was going well. However, so far they had been unsuccessful in finding Angel.

So, how can you help? Three ways, the first two are free and relatively easy. If you are so moved, PRAY! Pray that God's will is done in this situation, if it is His will for Angel to be found and for her to hear then Amen. If however, if it was enough for me and the others there, and you by extension to experience Him through our limited interaction with Angel then Amen. Pray! The second is share Angel's story and ask them to Pray!

The third is not free and I would only ask you to participate in a way that was not a burden to you, and that of course is financially, whether God leads us to find Angel or not, there are many kids who have medical needs which we are not able to address on our once a year visit but we can work thought the Episcopal Diocese of Honduras to help with as they come up. If you are lead to contribute to this or any of the other programs that Honduras Good Works does you can find out more about HGWs (http://www.hondurasgoodworks.org/) and make a contribution (http://www.hondurasgoodworks.org/giving.php?id=4) at their website.

If you are specifically donating to help Angel then in the Donation Designation area please choose "Mission Honduras" and add a note about Angel on your contribution.

More Stories about this years journey to come, but had to get that out out there :-)

And as the story progresses I will add updates!

Your Brother,

Randall

There are no coincidences...

2011-02-28T11:28:00.000-06:00

There are no coincidences...

It never ceases to amaze me how God works. Since meeting my biological father (or bio-dad as the kids say) over a year ago, I have struggled with the fact that we have not communicated more. My wife assures me, it is simply because we are a like I am not a communicator, and he has stated he is not a communicator. I do not have good connection with people, I don't reach out to say hi that often, I am not quite sure what to say. I am not good at small talk etc.

This includes my family and friends. it is nothing personal I am just not a good at reaching out to people. Well, needless to say this has been on my heart lately for many reasons, I want to change it, I want to connect better with people, I don't want to wait until it is too late with my kids, I want to avoid having the same lack of relationship with them that I have with my family.

I also want to build new bridges with my recently discovered biological father, but as I stated earlier he suffers from the same lack of communication.

When I found out that my "bio-dad" had had a stroke, I called and left a voice mail to let him know I was praying for him, he called back and left a voice mail that he was doing okay. Obviously there was a bit more to each of the voice mails but that is the jest. Unfortunately that was the end of the conversation.

As it turns out I have been praying about this for a while, and very intensely as of late, but I have not done much about it. This past weekend our church had a faith alive meeting, which I was able to attend parts of. On Saturday evening we were in small groups and one of the people was talking about God coincidences, after the meeting I mentioned having read "When God Winks: how the power of coincidence guides your life" and the fact that there are not coincidences rather they are moments when God is winking at you and saying "I am thinking about you, hang in there". We leave the small groups and go back to the larger group and I, having a few minutes, am praying about a number of things, including my perceived inability to communicate... when I look up and see my biological father, well it wasn't him, but it was in fact his doppelganger, coincidence #1. after a few minutes I approach him and say something to the effect that I was not sure how to say this but he looks just like my father, I show him the picture and he laughs and says "wow, often people tell me they have met me before but you are the 1st one to show me a picture of us" he shows his wife and she sees the resemblance, as do several other people standing around, including my oldest son. We chat a few more minutes about look-a-likes and family then the conversation moves on.

Little do I know, I am not getting the message... a few minutes later the doppelganger asks if my phone takes pictures, I say yes and he says "why don't we take a picture together so you can send it to your dad" coincident #2 or said another way, I didn't get the message the 1st time so God said it again. As it turns out we took the picture I sent it and my father and I are continuing to agree to find more ways to communicate more often.

Still not sure what that looks like but I know, in God's time and with His help, we will figure it out. However I do know, there are no coincidences....

peace
rh

Mission Trip Update

2009-07-08T07:54:00.005-05:00

If you haven't been watching the news lately you may not know that Honduras is in a state of civil unrest. The call was made yesterday to say the mission trip was canceled "for now". Our prayers for the people of Honduras continue, but "for now" that's all we can provide...

Now what? my family leaves Friday to visit grandma and grandpa, that means I will have two weeks with "nothing" to do. OR SO I THOUGHT. I had just finished reading the email from the mission team when I get another email. Another church in the area is taking their youth group on a mission trip downtown, kind of like a "stay-cation" but one of the leaders is not going to be able to make it.

When I was the youth leader at our church, we often did joint ventures with this youth group, so I know several of the kids and I know the leaders really well. I sent them an email and as a result I am now going on a different mission trip :-)

I am reminded of Romans 8:28 "And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose."

So keep checking back next week, there will be updates on the mission trip, starting Monday. The only difference is I will drive instead of fly, but we will do God's work none-the-less.

Letter is away

2009-06-22T11:24:00.001-05:00

Well, I wrote the letter and am now struggling with outlook to get it sent out... but as promised here is the letter:

My heart for mission trips continues to grow. I have an opportunity to return to Honduras with St. Christopher's Killeen for my second medical mission trip, their 11th. During their 10 years traveling to Honduras, the medical mission team has seen just under 30,000 patients and delivered over $2,000,000.00 of donated medicines. Additionally they have a group who is helping with scholarships (free school ends at the 6th grade), and another group building structures (medical clinics, churches, etc.). You can read about my 1st mission trip here: http://downrightfaith.com/voicecryingout/?p=22

This year, July 16th - 23rd, we will be taking just over 50 people, including at least 7 doctors, 7 nurse practitioners, 10 RNs, and 8 interpreters to Honduras. Each day we will break into 4 teams, which will visit 4 villages to provide medical care for 1 to 3 hundred people per village. So during our trip we hope to attend to about 3,000 Hondurans. We will not know the exact villages until just before we arrive.

I would like to ask you to support me in prayer and financially if you can. I have experienced just how powerful and necessary prayer partners are while on a mission trip and would like to have a good, strong prayer team. You can send your commitment to prayer and donations in several ways, my mailing address is at the bottom of this email, my email address is Randall@randallh.com and you can leave comments on my blog (http://firstsamuel16seven.blogspot.com/).

I want to thank you for your willingness to help and be a part of what God is doing in this Ministry to Honduras. I will be blogging about our final preparations and if possible while in Honduras and of course a summary when I return.

Thank you in advance for your support.

Sincerely,
Randall Holahan

1816 Solano Cove
Leander, Texas 78641

randall@randallh.com
http://firstsamuel16seven.blogspot.com/

Let's try again ... again

2009-06-22T00:24:00.003-05:00

As I look back over the last month and a half, there have been at least a few thing I needed/wanted to blog about... Meeting my biological father, learning about all the family I didn't know I had. His 3 day visit with his wife and my sister. My oldest son's summer visit. My youngest son's wound from the boat ride.... as each of these happened, along with many others, I thought I should blog about this.

Reality is I kept hoping the job situation would correct itself, at which point I would celebrate with a new post. Well, I guess I am tired of putting it off, I know finally, right...

I am 24 and a wake up from leaving for Mission Honduras 2009, my second trip. Truth be told I am very excited about this adventure and seeing what God has in store for us. The final packing party is coming up this Saturday.

Which reminds me of the other thing I didn't get done... sending out letter to encourage people to participate through me, via prayer, following my blog etc. I guess it is not too late. Okay that is my plan then. Tomorrow I will write the letter and then post it here as well as email and put it in the mail. That should give people time to respond with prayer requests etc before I leave in just over 3 weeks.

Your mission, should you choose to accept it is to hold me to that. If you don't see the letter here in 24 hours ping me and find out why not. You other mission, also your choice, is to keep me and my family in your prayers for the job situation as well me and the rest of the missionary team for the medical mission trip.

Let me know how I can pray for you. Remember what the angel told Mary in Luke 1:37 "For nothing will be impossible with God." but also remember Mary's response...Then Mary said, ‘Here am I, the servant of the Lord; let it be with me according to your word.’ (Luke 1:38a)

Here am I, the servant of the Lord; let it be with me according to your word, Amen!

Long time no blog

2009-05-05T22:21:00.002-05:00

As my lovely wife has reminded me a few times, I have not blogged in a while. Truth be told I have been in a bit of funk both spirituallly and mentally. I have not been worried about finding a job, we have been doing fine, however I have not, in many ways, felt as if I were contributing enough...I know silly but almost depressing at the same time.

Well, the last couple of days God has really jolted me right out of it, in a couple of ways...I had an interview on Monday, not sure where that will go but it was nice to at least sit down and talk about the possiblity of working. We have been very busy cleaning the house... for a couple of reasons (spring, too much junk we don't need/use, family visits etc.) Then today I got a call from my mom with some interesting news... she talked to my biological father and wanted to know if I would like to contact him or have him contact me...WHAT! DUH!

For those of you that know some of my story I have not, to the best of my knowledge, ever met him, I won't go into the details (as I know them) but I expected he would contact me when I turned 18, and have off and on since then spent time trying to find him. Over the last couple of years I have spend a bit more energy, and at one point thought I had probably found him but was not sure and did not know how to start a conversation.... "Hi, you don't know me, but 40 plus years ago...." In fact Jen and I just talked about it last week.

Well, our God works in mysterious and wonderful ways. He, Randy, send me an email today and I have since replied.... time will tell where it goes from here, as you know I am not the most outgoing persson, well okay at least not until you get to know me.

Kairos (καιρός) is an ancient Greek word meaning the right or opportune moment. Well this was a kairos moment if ever there was one. I am very much looking forward to getting to know him, catching upon 40 years of history and then some. Thank you Lord for bringing us together.

Mathew 18:20 comes to mind..."For where two or three come together in my name, there am I with them"

Peace,

Randall

Happy Birthday Son!

2009-03-10T09:54:00.003-05:00

nine years ago today my oldest son was born! that was day that changed my life. I remember looking into his eyes and thinking how lucky I was, a healthy son. I had no idea how much my life would change.

Zach is a strong will, intense, internal young man who has challenged me in many different ways over the last 9 years. But he did something which I don't think I have ever shared with him. He brought me back to God.

At that time in my life I had been running from God for so long I forgot I was running but I looked into those innocent eyes and remembered John 3:16 "For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten son..." I knew at that moment I couldn't do what God had done, this person was only a few minutes old and yet I could not imagine life without him.

Before he was born I was bad at relationships, unfortunately this included his mother, Zach has never known a home where both his mother and father live. There are times I wonder if that was the right thing to do, if it would have been better for Zach to stay and I realize it was the only thing to do, if he had any chance at happiness and "normal"

But the one thing I knew at the time was I would always be a part of his life. His mother told me she figured I would last 2 years and then he would never see me again, if I had followed my life pattern up to that point that would have been true, I did not maintain relationships longer than 2 years. The difference now was I was tethered to my son, and this changed my life.

It has been 9 years since his birth and I still spend time with him whenever I can. His mother and I are still trying to figure out how to be parents together while apart. He has come to love Jen as a second mother, one who could never replace his mom but rather be the bonus of a second mom, there are times I am jealous of their relationship, but I know at this age it is easier for boys to talk to moms than to dads, so I am glad he has two voices of reason to help mold and shape his future.

Zach continues to grow, physically and spiritually. He is up to the middle of my upper arm, putting him at over 4 1/2 feet tall. He plays basketball. He loves life. He loves to learn. He loves his bothers and his little sister. He makes me proud to call him son. I hope he is proud to call me dad.

9 years ago today, he saved my life. I love you son, happy birthday

Where does the time go

2009-03-09T14:52:00.002-05:00

My last post, almost a month ago, focused on living in the now. I think I have successfully done that over the last month, to the point of not keeping up with all I wanted to do.

For example, I had planned on creating a logo and challenging everyone to blog for lent, given that we are in the second week of lent I guess I will keep that one for next year :-) We usually pick up a new discipline or work on enhancing an existing one. We, Jen and I, talked about doing the love dare. unfortunately we haven't gotten to that... maybe tonight we can start.

My oldest son, turns nine tomorrow... where his time gone.

On the job front I am continue to search and have faith that God will provide. That being said I don't think I have been this busy in a while :-)

So I guess the point is to live in the now and yet to keep living and not get stuck chasing rabbits.

Now to catch up and get serious about Lent !!!

finding joy in "the now"

2009-02-19T12:46:00.000-06:00

I have found myself feeling down the last few days, I think the weight of my lack of employment has hit me. I know that God will provide and it will be okay, but what has hit me is a feeling of "not doing enough" though that is not the right phrase either.

At any rate I caught myself thinking it will be better when I get an interview, which made me laugh. (read with sarcasm) Sure, it will be. Then I will stress over the interview, did I say the right things... is it a company I want to work for.... then stress over the offer... then over the first day and first impressions for months to come... all the while laughing harder at each consecutive thing that I thought of.

The reality is God calls us to live in the now. Psalm 118:24 reminds us :"This is the day that the Lord has made; let us rejoice and be glad in it." Everyday and every moment was made by the Lord, and we should rejoice and be glad!

In John chapter 10 Jesus is explaining that he is the gate and all that enter through him will be saved, however he also warns that the thieves are poised to steal us away. In verse 10 he says "The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy. I came that they may have life, and have it abundantly." not that they may have life and EVENTUALLY live it abundantly but that they live abundantly in "the now"

if you catch yourself thinking about the "next great thing" stop and reflect on the current great things... find the joy in the now.

I don't have a job, but I do have time to spend with my wife and kids, time to catch up on my honey-do list, catch up with friends etc etc.

Long time no post...

2009-02-18T22:21:00.000-06:00

There are no coincidences... right?

My lovely wife has reminded me a few times in the last couple of days I haven't blogged.

In my Wednesday night men's group we did a spiritual gifts "test" and one of the things that came out as a gift was writing...

I was talking about blogging with my good friend tonight and saying I needed to find a routine...

I have asked God for guidance on finding that routine and posting in general...

I got home and applied for a job, updated my facebook status, read through my twitters, checked my linked in page... in the back of my mind I kept thinking... I think I am forgetting something.

Then out of the blue I get an email saying I needed to approve a comment on my blog...

Okay Lord I hear you...

now I just need to find that routine. There is an idea that I have had on my heart/mind for the last week or so to help this... keep posted it involves you.

Closest Moments

2009-02-02T20:38:00.000-06:00

I am a member of the 4th day movement aka cursillo community. Part of what we do is have weekly meetings with other 4th day members and we discuss our faith and actions in three areas Piety, Study and Action. Piety - what have you done to be closer to God, and what was your closest moment. Study - what spiritual aids have you used this week and Action - what apostolic opportunities have you had, what did you and what is your plan for the following week? We are an accountability group for each other and our continual walk in faith.

I bring this up because I wanted to put a little context around what a "closest moment" means. Today, my lovely bride had taken the kids to a play date at one of those jumpy houses, basically a large room filled with many very large inflatable items on which the kids can jump and play. While there the 5 year old was holding the 18 month old while they slid down one of the large slides and Jen was videotaping the memory, (probably to blog about later) while doing this she managed to step off the landing pad in such a way that her ankle twisted and it sounded like she "stepped on a bag of potato chips"

She calls me and I was, thank God, in the area, I came and picked them all up, took her to the emergency room, my old insurance lapsed, of course, as of my ending my employment on Friday. We had the forethought to get new insurance before the old lapsed you can read about that here. At any rate, thank God again.

Okay so the closest moment... I don't know about the 5 year olds you are in contact with, but mine was a shining example of the Love of Christ today. the entire time on the way to the hospital, at the hospital, on the way home, he was constantly reassuring his mother it was going to be okay, does it hurt, can I get you anything, I love you, etc. at one point she sat in a different place and put her foot on the chair he was sitting on, rather than saying something like "eww gross" he said "I like this better I can touch your foot" as he ever so gently rubbed her foot, being careful not to touch the swollen ankle.

Thank God for such a shining example of unconditional love, I was both proud and yet in awe of the Christlike example my 5 year old showed me today. it truly was a living example of what Jesus meant in Matthew 18:1-4 "At that time the disciples came to Jesus and asked, ‘Who is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven?’ He called a child, whom he put among them, and said, ‘Truly I tell you, unless you change and become like children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven. Whoever becomes humble like this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven."

Praise God!

BTW Jen is okay it is a very bad sprain, and she is adjusting to life with crutches and ice packs for a while.

random thoughts

2009-01-31T19:25:00.000-06:00

As I typed the title I immediatly flashed back to my teen years and Saturday Night Live, and now for deep thoughts by Jack Handley... I don't know that these thoughts are as deep as some of Jack's and I am fairly certain they are not as funny... but here they are anyway.

I am officially unemployeed for about 34 hours now... still no worries all I can say about that is praise God. ...lillies of the field...(Luke 12:25-28)

we have been giving our 18 month old medicine for just over a week. The thing is she doesn't like it so it is a two person job, one holding her "still" the other getting it down her throat and not letting her move until she swallows it. SHE DOES NOT LIKE IT, the interesting thing was tonight she immediately starting shaking her head no and trying to crawl away but we managed to get the medicine down in record time without crying. This got me to thinking about a discussion we had had in men's bible study around dealing with the same issue repeatedly. The observation was made that if we could figure out what God was trying to teach us we could probably get through it a lot faster and come out stronger on the otherside... in other words sometimes the only way we can learn something is to go through it over and over, usually kicking and screaming the 1st couple of times and eventually, if we look at it rationally we figure out why we are there and realize it is not so bad. I don't think this is exactly what Jesus meant when he talked about he said unless you come to me like these children... but then again maybe it was

The last is I finished the book "The Shack" and for those of you who have not read it, I encourage you to do so, it was even more moving and somehow very personal. I sat in Schlotzsky's one day last week, eating my sandwich, crying and I didn't care who saw me, i was truly moved. You can get more information ect on the official website I will be adding a link to my site to become part of the missy project.

okay gotta get the boys out of the shower...

peace

The Shack

2009-01-21T17:18:00.000-06:00

I have heard from several friends how good the book, "The Shack" by Wm. Paul Young is. So I finally started reading it. I was not sure what to expect and I will not give anything away with this post, so don't worry about spoilers.

I will tell you this, I am about half way through it and I have to admit Mr. Young has captured my attention with his characters. I am an avid reader, and many books I read I don't always get a true sense of the people in the stories, sometimes this is probably on purpose but most of the time I think the writer and the characters just don't connect. With the Shack, I am truly feeling very connected to "Mackenzie" or "Mack" one of the main characters.

I was completely caught off guard a few minutes ago, I was eating an early dinner, and sitting quietly reading, for those of you who have read the book I am about half way through the chapter titled "in the belly of the beast" and they are discussing what happened in the truck. (see no spoilers :-)) at one point I literally began crying, not because I had ever experienced what Mack or the other characters were experiencing but rather because I could feel the emotion that Mack would have felt.

I have to admit, this is a first. Granted I am a little soft hearted at times (clear throat, pound chest, "me man, ungh") my wife and I refer to movies that choke you up as "stupid movies" you know, sitting in a dark theater, trying to inconspicuously wipe the tear from you eyes before anyone notices and you say "(sniffle) stupid movie" That happens quite often, to tell the truth I get choked up on that "stupid show" extreme makeover home edition.... anyway all that may be true but it has never happen while reading a book, until today.

not sure if that is a good book review or not, but take it for what it is worth, Mr. Young has pulled me into the book to the point that I am feeling what his character feels. As a side note Mack did cry in the next sentence, I discovered when I was able to continue reading. "The Shack" is a book that will challenge you spiritually and I feel will change you spiritually as well, if you let it.

Peace,
Randall

Physical a.k.a. well-check

2009-01-20T15:56:00.000-06:00

I had my yearly physical today, as I was sitting half naked thinking "preparing" for the poking and prodding, I began a spiritual inventory.

The naked truth...We are always naked before God, so there is nothing to hide, if we examine ourselves as God sees us there are no garment to hide behind... if we are stripped of our pretensions, vanities and other items we use to look good to others... who are we?

Weigh-In: I usually joke with the nurse "I will just use one foot today" in the physical sense this would work but with the spiritual check up I have to look at my deeds, one one side of the scale deeds of which I are proud on the other side maybe things for which I not as proud. Being conscious of my faults, and working on changing them (or repenting....as in thinking about what I did and why I did it so that next time I might not do it) is a great step toward spiritual well-being.

Don't eat after midnight.... how is my fasting? not just a specific time set aside to pray but what about our other hungers... friendship, love, family, beauty, God's will?

First the nurse come in...

Blood Pressure: This is a physical one I do battle with, meds keep me normal but what about spiritual, is my pressure too high, not just inside me but outside of me, do I apply undo pressure to those around me. Is my pressure too low? (okay not mine LOL) is our pressure too low, are we uninvolved, or lacking stimulation. Is what I am doing important and am I doing it for the right reason (Glory to God).

Drawing Blood... am I spiritually anemic, am I less loving and compassionate than I should be, am I overly anger, hateful or hostile?

So then the doctor comes in... How are you feeling? Anything you are concerned about? In the same way as physical pain, emotional or spiritual pain/discomfort, can be a sign that something is wrong or about to be wrong.... get it looked at, don't wait, talk with your physician (spiritual advisor) before it festers and takes longer to heal

Ears, Nose and Mouth... what have I done, spiritually, with these organs? have there been times I have chose not to listen, to hear, to speak or to see. Have there been times I have chosen to listen, speak about or look at things I should have turned away from?

small rubber mallet... I always have to look away when the doctor using this... I know control issue :-) how are my spiritual reflexes, are my responses appropriate in time, emotion, etc. in other words do I respond in anger when walking away would be more appropriate, do I use cutting/biting humor when what is needed is loving words of encouragement. do I speak or choose not to speak without considering the impact?

EKG... The doctor worries about hardening arteries but I worry about a hardening heart and mind. Am I open to new ideas, experiences, learning, possibilities, God's call?

Other physical checks... the "not as pleasant" checks... probing and poking in places another person shouldn't go... what am I trying to hide from God and from others?

And lastly, as my doc calls them... doorknob issues, everything is done the doctor is about to head out, just as he grabs the doorknob the patient say, "did I tell you I was having memory loss?" what else do I need to bring before God, what other concerns might be affecting my spiritual health?

it was interesting to run through this in my mind as the doctor and nurse were running through it with my physical being. hopefully I don't wait a year to do this again... spiritually anyway, the physical can wait at least a year.... enough with the poking and prodding.

Reflecting

2009-01-15T15:16:00.000-06:00

Sometime reflecting or spending time in reflection can be a good thing, other times it is torture... for example talking to my 4 year old who will occasionally say... "hey dad, you remember when..." and we launch into a great discussion about something that happened, and how we felt about it.

on the other hand, there is reflecting on past work experience and attempting to capture the last 10 to 15 years of your life in short snippets of buzzwords that will cause an HR or hiring manager to say, "now THIS is a guy I want to interview" I would rather have the 1st type any day over the later. capturing ones life in snippets is no fun.

As I have been thinking about this, I couldn't help but wonder what my Christian resume would look like. I think it would have a completely different format and the buzz words would be very different, for example I would hope there would be more words like Love, Loved, Loving, Caring, Altruistic, Selfless, servant leader, good listener, you know now that I write that maybe they are not that different, I would like my professional resume to contain such sentiment as Caring, Selfless, servant leader, good listener, and hey why not loving! Maybe they use different buzz words but perhaps they should convey the same message.

Randall is a Caring, selfless, servant leader who is a good listener and has a loving disposition.

Now all I have to do is make that show forth using words like managed, resulting in, saving, designed, developed and deployed... well like Jesus said in Mathew and Mark "For man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible" so I will... With God's help.

Transitions

2009-01-14T14:59:00.000-06:00

It seems I am in the midst of two or more transitions. The first is transitioning from prayerfully considering going on the mission to Honduras again this year to having committed to go. I don't know that I didn't plan to go at any time, but I feel god has confirmed I need to attend. The second transition is from my current employer to the unknown. The end of January will bring with it the end of my employment.

Both are interesting and scary transitions, both in many ways bring to mind finances, trust in God, the future and other things. Both require my putting my trust in God to show me the way.

I am currently praying for the faith of David, Nathan told him that God said his designs for the temple were great, however the temple would not be built in his lifetime, rather that his son Solomon would build the temple. David response was not, "wait a minute God, here is MY plan!" rather his response was to praise and worship God. I don't know where the money or the energy for that mater, for the Mission trip will come from and I don't know where my next job is coming from, I do know that God has a plan, which in all likelihood is not the same as mine :-), and I praise Him for that, and walk with Him as I attempt to live into that plan.

time change has interesting side effects

2008-11-04T06:51:00.000-06:00

while I am sure there are bennifits to the time change, I am not sure what they are. So far the results seems to be tiredness, between the kids waking up an hour earlier, they were already early risers, to me waking up an hour earlier, and trying to convince myself I can still get an hour more sleep.

The upside was I was up in plenty of time to do my morning prayer etc, however I don't think I got as much out of it because I feel tired. The other upside is I was able to get that done and then watch the kids while my wife went out to vote. Speaking of which be sure to do that today... even if you think it doesn't count, it does.

So everyone is awake earlier but a little tired, and we get a few more things done early so in a nutshell time change has interesting side effects.

peace

Monday two-fer

2008-11-03T09:34:00.000-06:00

So, yesterday was EXTREMELY busy. I did manage to do my morning prayer while cooking chickens etc., I did not get a chance to post a post. This morning, with the time change the kids internal clocks are wacky so I didn't get to do morning prayer but I am posting, so between the two days I have a complete success :-)

Yesterday's morning prayer included a reading from 1st Corinthians 13, well I guess it was the whole chapter, now that I think about it. Anyway, I do enjoy this reading, not only because it talks about love and what love is, in the agape sense. But also because it reminds me that everything I do I should do with the love of Christ, or else it is meaningless. I could be the greatest father-son-brother-nephew-friend-boss-co-worker-employee the world had ever seen, but if I don't have love I have nothing. I could be the best ministry leader-teacher-Evangelist-mentor the world had ever seen but if I don't have love I have nothing. I could be the richest or poorest or or or but if I don't have love I don't have anything.

Said another way, if I don't have Christ I don't have anything. Praise God for his willingness to love me a sinner.

That is what I would have posted, had I posted yesterday, so now for the two-fer part...

A new section I am tentatively calling Monday's prayer list. things I am praying for this week, I encourage you to add your items and if led pray for the whole list... keep checking back and see what people are praying for.

The start of my list in NO particular order:

My friend Deborah who's cancer has returned and her husband Bernie
Precious Zoey who is battling leukemia for healing and her parents for strength

For our troops and their families, both in war zones and safe at home. Help them know they have my support and they are LOVED
For the elections tomorrow, regardless of the winner, may the Lord watch over them in their leadership, us under their leadership
For all the leaders of the world (see above)
For my wonderful kids. keep them safe and secure, filled with wonder and awe, teach them
For my wife, help her to find the rest she needs, give her the strength to be a stay-at-home mom.
For me as a father and husband, that I might be what my wife and kids need me to be and that I might teach them through actions the love of Christ.
For me as an employee, that I might do my job with the love of Christ and thankfulness for the employer who helps me put food on the table and a roof over my head
For my enemies, that I might see the love of Christ in them and they in me and one day we might share eternity together.
For George as he deals with the recent loss of his wife.
For Bruce, my pastor as he leads our church
For our Church
For my ministries that they might sow the seeds of Christ.
For the universal Church that the love of Christ might be seen around the world so that we might live into Jesus' proclamation... "repent for the kingdom of God has come near!"

What can we pray with you about?

Centering Prayer

2008-11-01T07:53:00.000-05:00

I have been thinking about Centering Prayer. I don't know why if I decided to do it where or how, but I am sure I can find a quiet 20 minutes without noise of the world, the kids, the dogs, the TV, okay maybe that will be harder than I thought...

Not sure why it has been on my mind lately, but I am going to try adding that to my weekly routine. I will let you know how it goes

if you are curious or perhaps you would like to try it for yourself here is a good description of how it goes... http://www.cellofpeace.com/cp_method.htm#method

short post today... have to go put together those sides I talked about yesterday...

Peace

Mud and Mire

2008-10-31T08:03:00.000-05:00

Part my morning prayer this morning was Psalm 40, but what specifically caught my attention was verse 2

He lifted me out of the slimy pit,

out of the mud and mire;

he set my feet on a rock

and gave me a firm place to stand.

This caught my attention for a couple of reasons, mainly the phase mud and mire.

Partly because it corresponded with my daily devotional by Max Lucado, he used the phrase muck and mire, he was talking about how Jesus spent 33 years in the muck and mire, experience everything we experience. He went on to say we don't like to think of Jesus this way, we would rather think of the majestic, perfect Jesus. However, that Jesus is not easily related to, that Jesus is not reachable, we can relate to the man, we can follow his example

The other reason takes a bit more explanation. One of the things our church Men's group does is BBQ chickens once a month and then sell a complete dinner (chicken with 2 sides) to the congregation. One of my roles in that is to prepare the beans each month. Which means making several batches of beans. As I do this in a crock pot, it basically takes all week. Well this week I went out and bought a second crock pot. I had been planning to anyway, it is different in that it comes with 3 different size bowls 2, 4 and 6 quart capacity. ideally if I am making a dessert I can use the 2 quart, meal for the family the 4 quart, and meal for a bigger group or beans for BBQ the 6 quart. The other part of this story that is important... if I am going to cook something overnight in the crock pot I have to do it outside, otherwise the smell gives my lovely bride dreams about food and keeps her awake :-)

So this morning it is still dark outside as I begin my morning prayer. The phrase mud and mire jumps out at me, I continue my prayer, the sun starts to come up, I realize the patio table, where the two crock pots should be is empty, no that's not it, it is empty but is is also very clean and the extension cords that should be plugged into the crock pots are running through the glass... ah that's what's missing the glass!!!! Well it seems the table we have had for 7 years has finally stress out, and on the patio is a nice pile of mud and mire. Beans, glass from the table, glass from the crock pot etc.

The best part is I didn't get upset instead, God pulled me from the mud and mire and placed me on a rock and gave me a safe place to stand. instead of getting upset and ruining my day, I continued my morning prayer. Had I not been doing morning prayer, but rather been starting my day less God focused I am pretty sure I would have stayed in the mud and mire.

okay time to clean up the mess before it becomes a slime pit, good thing it's trash day :-)

Peace

Day 1 but who's counting

2008-10-30T07:09:00.000-05:00

i have been praying and thinking about habits and how to form a new one, one in which I start my day with prayer, study and blogging. I finally came to the realisation I wasn't going to do it on my own so I did what I should have done in the first place, I gave it to God. Yesterday, whenever I thought I about forming this new habit I would give it to God, as the day wore on my prayer began to form into a prayer to wake up at 6:30. Plenty of time for prayer, study and blogging.

So here I am 30 minutes after having woke up, with God's help, at 6:30 am. I prayed morning prayer via a great online resource I found called the dailyoffice.org and now I am blogging.

The opening reading for morning prayer for today was "Thus says the high and lofty One who inhabits eternity, whose name is Holy, 'I dwell in the high and holy place and also with the one who has a contrite and humble spirit, to revive the spirit of the humble and to revive the heart of the contrite.'" Isaiah 57:15

What an amazing God. God, whose name is holy, who is the high and lofty ONE who inhabits eternity could do anything he wanted, could spend His eternity in any fashion he chooses, and how does he chose to spend His time, reviving the spirit of the humble and the heart of the contrite! Praise God!

There is a song "Make me a prayer" I always remember one of the lines in this song, humble my heart so that You may draw near. God is as close as we will allow him to be, if we keep him at arms length he will be there, if we deny him and turn our back on him, he will be there. But if we humble ourselves, and humble our hearts God will draw closer... in other words if we get out of the way he will get closer. That is my prayer for today, humble my heart Lord that you might draw closer and that others might see your light shining in me.

Peace

Habits

2008-10-29T20:56:00.000-05:00

Habits are a funny thing. Old ones are hard to break, new ones are hard to form, well good ones are hard to form, bad ones seems to happen naturally. My last post was over two weeks ago, I had the intention to post everyday. That statement is an example of both breaking a bad habit and forming a new good habit. The bad habit is wanting to do something but not getting it done, the new habit is writing a post everyday.

So I am trying a new method, not sure how it will work out but the world will see :-)

Here's a hint:
1st Corinthians 7:23-24 tell us "All of you, slave and free both, were once held hostage in a sinful society. Then a huge sum was paid out for your ransom. So please don't, out of old habit, slip back into being or doing what everyone else tells you. Friends, stay where you were called to be. God is there. Hold the high ground with him at your side"

I need to get back to where I was called.

one last note about habits...

a convent caught fire in the middle of the night, the nuns woke up in the smoke on the second floor and pondered what they should do. One of them suggested they take off their robes, tie them together and then use them to climb down out of the window to safety. So, they decided this was the best thing to do and proceeded, upon arriving on the ground they redressed and then called 911.

In the aftermath, with the building smoking a reporting asked one of the nuns if it was true that they disrobed and used their garments to climb out of the window? The nun confirmed this was true to which the reporter asked, "given the state of disrepair of your robes were you worried about them tearing as you climbed out?" "Not at all," replied the nun " as you know old habits are hard to break"

bad pun, good point. But remember Matthew 19:26b "With God all things are possible"

Peace

Take a minute for us

2008-10-13T09:37:00.000-05:00

Our family is always busy, for good reasons. church, men's group, women's group, EFM, Jen's reunion group, my reunion group, community outreach, dsact, ds events, oh yeah and family activities (just wait until there are games to make, and school stuff).

Needless to say, Jen and I have to work to make time for each other, which I think we do okay at but could always do better. Yesterday was our 6 year wedding anniversary, which means we have been together for just under 8 years! my how time flies. Yesterday we were able to take a few minutes (hours but they flew by like minutes) to be just ourselves. We saw a really good movie and a movie that was good in that Jen was able to take a bit of a nap (I dozed too), we had dinner, at the movie (love alamo draft house) but more important than all of that we got a chance to talk and just be us, without having to worry about where Sydney was crawling off to, or why the boys were so quiet, or the dishes need to be done or or or... it was just us and it was nice.

On the other hand something was missing, the extra noise, the occasional celebrity like status of people wanting to talk to the baby, the having a converstation, between Anthony's conversation, those things that have become part of our lives. The good news is we still enjoy each other's company and had plenty of things to talk about for 8 hours without the kids.

Big thanks to Arthur and Cathy for watching them and for allow Jen and I to take a minute for us.

One Big Family

2008-10-12T09:04:00.000-05:00

Last night Sydney, Anthony and I went with 4 of their God Parents to Walburg. Walburg is a local community with great german resturants and since it is October... So we went to our favorite place, we got there early to get a good seat, in my opinion it was the best seat in the place. center of the floor, under the tent between both band stages.

So we ate dinner, had a beer and got ready for the bands to start. Anthony ran around with the other kids that were there, checking in occasionally, or one of us checking on him. Sydney was passed around too.

The bands started, we were playing dominos and occasionally dancing. But for some reason my radar kicked in, at the time I wasn't sure why. Eventually I figured it out, there was a woman hovering close to whomever was holding Sydney, well it didn't hit until I was holding her and the woman came over and nervously said, "she is so beautiful...my neice has down syndrome" sort of hesitant, sort of cautious, not sure if it was the right that to say or what to expect in response. I said thank you to the beautiful part and then smiled. she then asked if she could take her off my hands for a few minutes, I said sure... radar recalled she sat at a table to my right, Nancy looked over at me with a questioning look. I said, "her neice has downs" to which Nancy replied "Oh. It really is like one big family, having downs I mean"

It is, like one big family. an extra chromosone anywhere in your immedate family and you are in :-) Praise God for that family, and for being able to be a part of it. To be able to proudly go in public, enduring the occasional "stares" and rewarded with the occasional knowing "she is so precious/beautiful" from people who see what God sees :-)

Time for the Saint's to March

2008-10-11T06:31:00.001-05:00

Next Sunday is our second annual buddy walk. We participated last year when Syd was only 3 months old. At the time we needed to come up with a name. We had a great picture of Sydney in a teeshirt her grandmother had gotten her, on the front it said "Miricle" and on the back it had button on wings, I have been calling her my angel since before she was born, and her grandmother calls all her grandkids angels... anyway we had decided that was the picture we would use for the donation site and then found out we would need a name... so all our team members became Sydney's saints. The name has stuck.

What a differenace a year makes, last year we were not sure what to expect. Although we had been participated in many different fund raising events, Susan B. Komes (can't remember how to spell it), Walk for a Cure, Turkey Trot, JDRF, etc. This was our first buddy walk. We signed up, found a few people to join us (20 I think), raised some money and headed out.

It was amazing! it was not like any walk I had ever participated in, it was not about finding a cure, it was not about mourning being too late, it was not about another year of survival, it was more like a family picnic with fun and games, helicopter and swat humvees (to look at not to control crowds), face painting and fun, live music (biscuit brothers) and oh yeah there was a walk.

Well this year we go in eyes wide open, Jen has been on the planning committee from the beginning. I am supporting her and them from the outside, helping where I can. Of course next Sunday is all hands on deck so I am sure I will find plenty of work to do. As of right now we have 40 walkers, haven't raised as much money, not surprising given the current state of the economy. But we are looking forward to going back to our yearly family reunion :-)

I guess I should include information about the buddy walk and the team just in case you are curious.

This is the Sydney Saint Donation page: http://www.active.com/donate/buddywalk08/sydney2008

There are links there about the buddy walk, joining the team etc.

Peace,
Randall

31 for 21 is hard

2008-10-08T14:45:00.000-05:00

There is good news and there is bad news about committing to 31 for 21.

The bad news is I haven't kept up, life happens (busy, busy, busy) but no excuses.
The good news is I am getting into more of a routine about posting daily, which is part of the reason I wanted to commit.

I am traveling for work yesterday and today, if I were providing excuses that would be it :-) today at our lunch break we started talking about kids etc. and of course I took this opportunity to brag about all three of my kids. We also talked about special needs resources in the Austin area and were talking specifically about Down Home Ranch and DSACT. I have posted some about the later but not the former....

If you haven't heard about Down Home Ranch check it out. DHR was started by Jerry and Judy Horton a number of years ago. At the time they were looking for resources for their young daughter who has downs, having looking around the country they didn't find what they were looking for so they started DHR.

The mission is to build a rural, self-reliant community for adults with intellectual and developmental disabilities, offering training, housing, recreation, and dignified employment, as well as opportunities for growth in mind, body, and spirit.

The accomplish this mission very well. I first heard about it a number of years ago as a volunteer effort through Dell. I found out a number of cool things about what they do. I immediately told our church about their poinsettia program, which we have used ever since. They have several green houses where they grow and then sellpoinsettias. I also learned about their "training" program where young adults can learn to prepare to live on their own.

They have many programs like summer camps, horse back ridding, etc

If you live in the area, check them out... they can always use volunteers. if you have a child or young adult with special needs, regardless of where you live check them out.

most importantly keep them in your prayers. keeping an operation like this up and running takes lots of work and lots of prayers

Looking back

2008-10-06T12:12:00.000-05:00

I have noticed a number of post "looking back" to the "early" days

Jen has reposted the snowglobe story.

Nicole is bouncing back and forth from today to the "early" days.

this got me to thinking about why Jen and I started the blog in the first place. I think I mentioned at first it was to keep family and friends updated since Sydney was in the NICU for the 1st two weeks. that was the start but not the START.

we really decided long before Sydney came, but after we got the news, that we wante to share ur story and journey with other families. I'm a part time internet junkie, when i don't know the answer to something or even when I do to ensure I am right I turn to google, and other search engines. So it should come as no surprise that when we found out we were going to have a baby with DS I went straight for the web. If you have done this, or if you haven't done it lately... try it (later) go to Google or your favorite search engine and search for Downs, Down syndrom, T-21, Trisonomy 21 etc. What you will find, very prevelently is the clinical, medical, cold, often too cold, hard facts about what down syndome is and all the things that MIGHT happen to your baby and all the challenges your child will have, in many ways it is depressing.

So we set out to create a place that not only talks about our journey, but more importantly our journey WITH God. thus http://downrightfaith.com was created. it was originally a brief introduction with a link to a photo album and a link to the blog. we have since combined the two and automaticly direct everything to http://downrightfatith.com/weblog.

Needless to say there are MANY websites that tell the factful but loving side of live with DS. where you can learn the joys, the heartbreaks, the ups and downs, hear from mothers and fathers (mothers mostly.... come on dads!!) from the kids and young adults with downs from their syblings. the issue is these sites are hard to find, you have to dig or know where to look, or know someone who knows.

The recent bill that was passed will better help ensure doctors tell both sides of the story to expecting families. And their are many great organizations and websites, in our area it is the Down Syndrom Association of Central Texas (DSACT). Many of these sites are easier to find for several reasons, they include a part of the country and they are linked to by many sites. so when people refine their search, from Down Syndrome to down Syndrome central texas or down syndrome texas or down syndrome Austin etc they will likely find DSACT. These organizations then often have links to family websites etc that I talked about earlier.

Okay i know i know what's the point. the point is there are MANY factors that get links moved up in the Google results criteria. Several of the important ones include page loading time, content, how many sites are backlinking to you, their quality and much more...

page load time is up to your service provider
conten is up to you
how may sites are backlinking to you an their quality are up to other people.... for your site. But for their site... you are other people :-)

so my challenge to all who are reading this is two fold:
1. more dad's tell us how you feel
2. link to each other... it will help people find you.

Prayer for Healing

2008-10-06T08:27:00.001-05:00

A quick post... I am not in the habit of posting everyday, but I will make up for it today, I hope :-)

My wife and I lead a discussion with memebers of our church, the topic was special needs acceptance. I worked with the youth and Jen worked with the adults. As it worked out I finished a little early and headed over to the adult class to watch her in action :-) she was close to wrapping up when a good friend of ours asked an interesting question "With people with special needs, is it okay to pray for healing?" the conversation when deeper (you can read Jen post here). In a nut shell is praying for people with special needs, e.g. blindness, deafness, genetic disorders, etc. to be "cure" or "healed" okay?

I have several thoughts on this and I am sure there are others. 1. Pray what is on your heart. 2. when praying for someone else, asked them what they would like/need prayers for. 3. Somethings don't need to be "healed" or "cured"

I believe everything is created the way it is for a reason. or said another way, I believe God creates each of us in a unique way, for unique reasons, which we may or may not accomplish. I believe we often assume to be "healed" is to be made like me. I don't think that should be the definition, I think the definition should be to be healed is to be make like Jesus but since none of us can be Jesus then it would be to be like the person Jesus calls us to be, to live the life of the Kingdom of God. Jesus tell us in Mark 10:13-15 that unless we receive to the Kingdom of God like a child we will not recieve it.

So perhaps it would be more appropraite for us to pray that we were more LIKE people with DS, loving, accepting, caring, rather than that they were more like us.

Payday thoughts

2008-10-03T10:13:00.000-05:00

It's funny It's funny how the mind works. As I processing what to write on the blog today, I was reflecting on some of the things my wife has written on her blog (http://downrightfaith.com/weblog) one of the most inspiration and thought provoking things is her snow globe analogy on the "mother's perspective" page in which she talks about life being like a snow globe and everything had just settled down and was calm and then God picked up her globe and shook it. I am probably not doing it justice... please read it yourself it is a wonderful story.... The point was :-) I have read many people's stories about what it was like getting the news getting you are going to or you have had a special needs baby. One of the more famous is you on a plane to go on vacation and ending up in a different country.

For me, I think I went through the various thoughts a father might have, I mourned for the things she wouldn't be able to do and as a result the things I wouldn't be able to do like she wouldn't be able to marry/and I wouldn't get to walk her down the aisle. I think most of those thoughts were quickly replaced with the thoughts that she would be able to do anything she put her mind to, same as my sons, same as anyone else, she will live up to her potential and into her expectations, if we don't limit those, neither will she.

My next thought was a fear for her outward appearance, not that I wouldn't love her but that other people would find it hard to get past it to her heart. If I am honest the image that first came to mind was the one from middle school health class, the black and white picture of a boy with down syndrome, I think it might have been entitled "Mongoloid Child". It only took about two minutes to search online to replace that image with hundreds of others, children that were beautiful. You can see Sydney on the right, but if you go to my wife's website you can see other pictures of her as well as find links to many other families blessed with children who have down syndrome, if you have that "mongoloid" image in your mind I encourage you to replace it, that is a face of down syndrome yes but it is taken out of context. That same face with a smile or that same face looked at with love is a thing of beauty.

I seem to be chasing rabbits this morning... I will come back to those and other thoughts in a later post. The thing I thought about today and thought about when we got the news 2 years ago and honestly think about every two weeks if not more is money. Not the typical money questions, truth be told I am not a worrier, I truly believe God will and has provided for our every need. That being said I still catch myself worrying about the future, not my future but Sydney's.

One difference in parents who have children with special need and those that don't is how they think about the future. Before we got the news that Sydney had down syndrome my thoughts were I will be 41 when she is born, that means I will be 59 going on 60 when she starts college or said another way I will be ready to retire when she starts her career 65 - 24. Now my thought is still the same, she will probably be ready to start college at about the same age. This is a BIG change from 20 years ago... in the '80s people with downs life expectancy was about 25 years and graduating from high school much less college was un-heard of. Today the life expectance is about 49 (doubled in the last 20 years) who knows with medical changes etc etc Sydney and her peer's life expectance might grow that much again which would be 75 (or 98 if it doubled). which brings me back to where I started..."Payday thoughts" What can I do..? How do I...? What is the best way to go about...? What should I be doing...? to make sure Sydney is taken care of after we are gone?

Here is my thought process. Sydney is 41 years younger than me. When she reaches the current life expectancy of people with downs, 49, I will be 90 years old. When she reaches 75 I will be 116, my goal has always been 110 so that is push it a little :-) What can I do to make sure she is as self sufficient? How do I help her live on her own? What is the best way to go about making sure her brothers are there to help her, but not do it for her? What should I be doing to get her ready to live on her own, a self reliant productive life in which she is in control. How do I ensure all three children are ready to live their lives, understand money, not make the same mistakes I have made. I think I know how to do this with the boys, I am not sure I know how, YET, to do this with Sydney.

So, what do I do...honestly sometimes I cry, sometimes I run through worst case scenarios. Ultimately I do the only thing that works... I give it to God. I know that God will provide for her and the boys the same way he provides for Jen and I. I know that God will open the doors and lead the way if I let him. As a good friend of mine puts it, I am God's son, and they are my children, but they are not God's grandchildren, they are in fact His sons and daughter, and he loves them as much as me and you. So the one thing I can do is set a good example, and into God's promises, and in their own time, they will do the same. This then ends the worrying :-)

Praise God!

31 for 21 challenge

2008-10-02T10:02:00.000-05:00

October is Down Syndrome Awareness Month. There is a challenge called 31 for 21. The rules are simple, there are no rules. The goal is to post every day for the month of October preferably about down syndrome, aka Trisonimy 21 or T-21. thus the name 31 (days in October) for 21 (T-21 or down syndrome).

The real goal is to raise awareness and remove stigma and/or dogma about down sysndrome.

I am the father of three wonderful kids. 2 boys 8 and 4.5 and a 15 month old girl. My daughter, Sydney, has down syndrome. My wife and I, mostly my wife, post about how the day in and day out details of raising a special needs child in a life of faith and how we rely on God. (http://downrightfaith.com/weblog).

We started that site, when Sydney was born becasue she was in the NICU for the first 2 weeks of her life, and we needed a way to communicate to the masses that everything was okay. At first we just posted pictures and an occasional update. As time moved on we turned it into a real blog. The idea was we, both my wife and I, would post. My wife was a bit more diligent about it than I was, and now almost a year and half later I feel like I am invading her space when I post, though I don't think she sees it that way. So I thougth I would strike out on my own...

1 chose the verse 1st Samuel 16:7 as the title for the blog because I think it speaks to how God sees all of us, and it reminds us how we should see people. The world sees the outward appearance, but God sees the heart. Later Jesus tells us (Matthew 22:37-39) that the greatest commandments is to love the Lord our God with all our heart and all our mind, and the second is like it, to love our neighbors like ourselves. I believe this is what we are called to do with all people, regardless of outward apperance, we are called to love them will all our heart.

so that is my goal for October and beyond amist my ramblings and posts to bring to light the beauty that can be seen when we look at each other with the love of God.